Remember me when you're back at school

Look, another post! And only 2 days later!

I realized yesterday that it's been probably about 6 years since the last time I had a period of longer than a few weeks that I didn't "like" anybody. "Like" like.. whether it be just a dumb little crush, or something much stronger. And for the past couple months, I haven't really "liked" anybody, haven't had that kinda girly "OMG he's so cute" thing. Which is really weird, for me. It's not like I'm all that guy-crazy.. There's just always somebody I'm really interested in. So it's pretty crazy that right now and for the past couple months, I am a 100% crush-free Hoddie. And frankly, I don't WANT to "like" anybody. haha I dunno, it's kinda nice just being me, without thinking about guy issues or wanting to look presentable for any other reason than because I feel like it. I think after having two pretty intense relationships in a row, with messy endings, I'm ready to just kind of coast and enjoy life how it is now. Yay for being single! In other news... I've decided, of course, against telling my boss(es) to go suck a wall. $800-ish is nice, especially since I realized today that my $319 for apartment deposit stuff hasn't come out yet. haha

But man, it's soo hard to actually GO to work, and then to actually STAY at work. But I've pretty much decided that these last couple weeks are just gonna be chill out weeks. I'm ONLY going to be writing letters and doing F2s. Well, I have to get out Robin's mailer next week, but I've already done all the time-consuming parts of that, besides the copying of the 14-page questionnaire (fuuun) and filling out the Delivery Confirmation slips with the names and addresses. But good news, I don't think the mailer is very huge. Less than 100, I believe. Yay, good times.

Okay, so I'm probably gonna need to get a new battery for my iPod kinda soon-ish. The charge doesn't last quite as long. It's still pretty long, but usually only 5-ish hours, as long as the equalizer isn't on. Maybe 6. But the problem = they don't make iPod Minis anymore. *shakes fist* stupid Nano! lol hummmm....

19 DAYS. I can make it 19 days. That's 2 days less than 3 weeks.

Alas....I should probably get back to work....

I worked my butt off for this?

Have you ever been royally screwed over by someone you've given an unbelievable amount of time and energy for? Yeah. It's fun.

I've been killing myself working 60+ hours a week for this dang research study, for 12 weeks straight. Minus last week, since I only worked Monday-Wednesday and 2 hours on Thursday, I only got 40 hours for last week. (Yeah, in 3 days I worked 40 hours, jerks.) I've been doing everything that the other ladies 1) don't want to do and 2) don't have time to do. I'm not just a stupid temp, dang it! So yesterday I talked to Gale on the phone, and she asked me when my last day of work would be. As we were getting off the phone, she said "Well, work as much as you want to until you leave." Okay, to me, that indicates that I could actually "work as much as I want to" which means to keep working as much as I can, getting as much done as possible, in however many hours that takes. Then in the afternoon she sent out an email saying, "There will be no overtime for temps or Kelly Service employees. Any overtime by staff" -- that means Jan and Robin -- "must be approved by Dr. Horton." etc etc. um.... ??? So apparently "work as much as you want" translates to "We think you're stealing our money and not working, so you can't work overtime anymore or be fraudulant." Since that makes a whole crapload of sense.

So now there's a choice. Do I say, "Well, thanks for the good times, but please take this job and shove it." or do I work my measely little 40 hours the next 3 weeks? There's SO much I get done in those extra 20+ hours. They just have no idea. I kind of want to say, "Yeah, thanks, but no thanks" and after this week just be done with them.. but then again, I'd feel really bad for Jan and Robin. They are gonna be overwhelmed enough without me doing what I do when I leave, but for me to just up and be done, they'd probably freak out. It'd be $860 I wouldn't get, cuz for 40 hours I take home $433...stupid taxes. But having my last two weeks here work-free is highly appealing. After having SO much fun last weekend, it's really hard to go back to work anyway. Plus, it's not like Gale or Dr. Fishman would care if I quit working 2 weeks earlier than planned. The only ones it'd affect would be Jan and Robin. I'm just fed up. Bah.

I'll probably stay on. At least for this week and next week. Maybe I'll take off that last week, and settle with making it back to Utah with about $1700 in my bank account and my car only half paid off.


Anyway, this past weekend/trip to NC was amazingly awesome. I've lost motivation to write more at the moment though.. I'm still ticked about all that other stuff up there. *shakes fist*

Mystery

.....why isn't my other post showing up?? *shakes fist* I republished my whole blog twice!...

maybe this'll do it. psh!

Just leaving

Wow. Things were pretty crazy dramatic there for a while.. but I think they're finally settled down for good now. I hope. :)

I can't believe how unbelievably ready I am to go back. Every minute makes my muscles more restless and I feel like any second now I'm just going to start running, and never stop until I'm back where I belong. My mom is leaving MD for a year and a half, and the only thing left tying me here will be the few friends I still have here, mainly Steph.

I feel like I've done a lot of growing up over the past few months. There are a lot of things I feel like I'm ready to do now. I've spent so much time just thinking about what I want to do and the steps I'd need to take, but it was just thinking. I never took that first step. It's time to move on now, really. No more of this "I want to..." or "I wish..." or "That'd be awesome." Got that? :-pBut this is why I'm so antsy. I can't do any of those things here, I'm just stuck in this liquid phase of being unbelievably ready to pounce, but not having legs to do it. It's time to go. I'm so impatient for something to start. At least I'll get a break this weekend -- I'm going to NC. Hello Spring Break! haha I'm so excited. And when I get back, I'll only have 3 weeks left, and 3 weeks isn't all that bad.

The equation of DEATH

Man, this sucks. A week ago, I didn't really have much to think about or to worry about. Now, there are like a dozen huge decisions all trying to kill me at the same time. Sorry guys, I can only be killed once at a time, so you're just gonna have to take turns, okay? Geez! These hatchet-weidling decisions are so inconsiderate. I don't know what to do about anything anymore.

Live with my sister or my best friend?
Sell my car or not sell my car?
Europe or no Europe?
Anything and everything related to school?
BAH.

So I got my hair highlighted today. It looks cool, lol I was looking in the mirror a few minutes ago while washing my hands, and for a second I looked like Avril Lavigne, which is fairly insane if you've ever seen me. lol Anyway. The girl who did my hair was really cool. She did highlights and low-lights, and my mom thinks the highlights are too white-ish and the low-lights are too red-ish..and yeah they kind of are, but every time I get highlights, it always seems to not good at first, but then after a couple shampoo sessions, some of the color strips out and it's where it should be. And even if that doesn't happen, I think it looks cool. :) Jackie (the girl who did the stuff) said I look better with lighter hair, and I happen to agree.

Anyway. My mom awesomely gave me a gift card as a huge random early birthday surprise for the hair stuff, and when I got home there were these two little soft fuzzy animals from the Disney Store on my bed. So freakin cute! lol :) I think she's trying to get blog time.. Well, man, she's earned it. You know, for the gift card and the fuzzy soft stuffed animals. That whole "giving me life" thing, yeah, I guess that was pretty nice of her too. ;-)

This week has just NOT been a productive week for me. Tomorrow's gonna be a good long work day, hopefully, but Saturday I need to clean my room and do extra running and put my bed back together and try to organize things and pick stuff to put into a box to ship out to Utah, AND I'm going to see the high school play that night, possibly with an old friend. So Saturday will be a good day, but tres busy. Not much allowance for 10 hours of work, if I'm to get all those other things done too!

Tried to come up with a title....but I got nothin.

I am very quickly falling way, way behind in the "number of posts" of Plato's Understudy vs. Behind These Hazel Eyes. I don't know why that's my blog's title, my eyes aren't even hazel. I guess I just really like the song. lol

It seems like every day I say, "I can't believe it's already (fill in the date)". It seems to be working out that time seems to go faster when I think that way. lol Anyway, the point is, I can't believe it's March already. I love March.. just the name of the month is happy. When I think of March, I think of when flowers start to come out. I think of sunshine and grass and budding leaves on trees, and cherry blossom trees that bloom before any of the other trees. Plus, March has my birthday, which is kinda cool too, I suppose. lol

This week it's been difficult to keep working as hard as before. I'm gonna have to seriously bust my butt the next 3 days to get up to 60 hours. I've only got 31 so far, lol soo yeah.

I really, really want to go to Europe with Jenna and some people from her ballroom team.. but I just don't think I'm gonna be able to do it. I've been thinking about selling my car and getting something cheaper, but I drove my car again today and realized I love it too much. lol I've been working too hard to just give it up. I don't want to still be paying it off 3 years from now, either.. and the $3,000 it would cost to go to Europe for 10 days would put a verrrry substantial dent in the rest of my car stuff. I talked to my mom about all this yesterday, and she said right now probably isn't the best time for my "first Europe experience" and heck, she's probably right, as mothers usually are. But I want to go SO badly.. like, it makes me want to cry when I think about how real the opportunity is, and that I might just pass it up. If there was some magical way to pay my car off, pay for tuition and books and rent and costs of getting back out to Utah, AND go to Europe, then I'd be totally all up ons. *beats head on the wall* I wish I was getting paid for two full-time jobs like Jenna is, and I wish I didn't have to worry about debt on my car or school, cuz then I'd definitely be able to go.

Gah.

I'm really moody today.. I want a fluffy dog or cat that'd come lay next to me and make me feel all better. lol I'm such a sap.

I need to finish my stuff for BYU and get it sent back, ASAP. And, I need to print out the housing stuff and send it to Liz, ASAP. lots of things to do here pretty quickly, aaaand I haven't gotten 'em done yet.

I did, however, do my "running" and proceeded to eat a bowl of Kix my mom got me and skim-deluxe milk. It was pretty much amazing. lol :)

And with that, I bid you adieu.